Time Makes Things Better

It's been 2 months since last I wrote. It's been a crazy 2 months. The house went on the market May 13. For Sale! Within 7 days two separate sets of people looked at it. A younger couple *loved* it, and my RE agent said it looked promising, but in the end, the couple decided it was too far a commute to their job (so why were they here in the first place?). The second couple said the house required too much work.

I am not unhappy it's not selling. I'm not even curious why nobody is looking at it because I think I know the answer. It's a very special house that only a specific type of person will have interest in. If 100 people are looking to buy, I'll be lucky if 1 of them wants a house 219 years old.

This morning the boiler anti-freeze was delivered to hazardous recycling. It's a once-a-year event whereby hazardous material is accepted by Greene County's main recycling center, for free. Yahoo! That had been a big concern of mine.

There is one large item left to go: The old furnace. I've given it to a friend of a friend, and he's supposed to take it this week. Another Yahoo!

Tony's wedding is now less than 6 weeks away. As is often the case with mother of the groom, I'm left out of any planning, etc. It was no problem to take my money to help pay for the event, but pretty much I'm being ignored.

Tony hasn't yet found a job downstate so he is still living with me. It's not without problems, but after a major blow-up early in the spring, we reached an agreement and he is still here. Of course, he's not paying me his R&B or on his loan as often as he's supposed to.

Ember is doing great! The schedule for her care is changing this summer, but I will still have her for an overnight at least every other week. As she gets older, and thus easier to care for, I get tired easier. It's a good thing she's 4 years old and not 4 months old. I love her so much. She is great fun and great company.

Henny Penny is here rubbing her head against my hands. It's difficult to type, that's for sure.

I know a lot more has occurred in the past 2 months but they are history and I continue to look forward. The intense pain of missing Ron has lessened. I still cry every day about something, but it passes. I'm not sleeping well, but I suspect it's a function of many things, not just missing Ron. I think he would be content with the way I've handled things. He would be appalled at the disposition of some of his stuff, but in the end, he'd be fine with it.

I think often of what it would be like had the cancer not spread and the chemo had kept the cancer at bay. I think by now he would be sick again, and I'd be caring for him and the property and I'd still have to face his estate, which has taken me almost a year to handle. I can imagine him being sick, getting sicker, lingering, and I know I'm glad it didn't end that way. I just wish the cancer had not returned for a few more years so we had more time together where we were both healthy.

I miss him but I am alive and he isn't.