Long Time - No Write

So today I write. It's been a very long time. There's no way I can catch up here with all that's been happening in my life. I'll write as the thoughts come to me..

The house has not sold. In October, a woman from NYC was very interested and looked at the house twice. She still has an interest but her son has told her it's too much of a project for her to take on at her age -- which is 75 years.

Tony and Brianna married on August 6. It was a lovely wedding. Everybody was happy except probably me. I'm sure the pictures taken, which I have not yet seen, show me looking old and unhappy. The date was a week after the one-year anniversary of Ron's death, and I was also still in a place of grief that didn't mesh with being happy about anything or anybody. Also, my thoughts were wrapped around Ember and how her daddy was moving so far away. It just isn't right.

Ember is growing like a weed. She will be 5 years old the end of March. I take care of her two days one week and three days the next, when she spends Tuesday night at my house. She's often full of attitude. It's probably partly due to age and partly due to some of the environment in which she lives.

Autumn around here was a lot of work. I raked and raked and dumped and dumped. There are still a ton of leaves on the grass but I ran out of steam and interest. The plumber was here a couple of times, to the tune of over $500, to fix the draining problem with the washer. Insulation was blown around the sill in the cellar and in the attic. Gutters were installed front and back. I did other work myself, work Ron would have done.

Thanksgiving was spent with Maureen and her crew at Turning Stone. That place has a great buffet. Cara came with me. She and I had been in contact the previous week. It was nice to be together with people I love.

And now it is Christmas. I am psyched this year. Last year was so awful. Even more awful looking back than it was when I lived it. I don't remember much about the day. I don't even remember what I gave people to eat. This year Tony & Brianna will be here along with Em, of course, and Judy. I overbought, but not as bad as last year. The tree is, as usual, too dry but it's also very beautiful. Dinner will be the typical turkey, but it's our favorite.

I still miss Ron. Life isn't as sad. I enjoy many things again, but each night when I go to bed I usually still cry some and so yearn for him.